I have no pictures to show. Inspired by the “Sunflower on Canvas”, I’m working on larger sunflower painting using a full sheet of water color paper. I won’t be able to show this work until Chris gets back around the 25th. I wrote a poem today which sums up life as I have known it as an adult.

Possibilities

A cloudy morning

brings memories

of long ago.

A day of walking

on campus at U fo M.

Drinking in my autonomy,

loving myself.

And seeing possibilities, so many passing through

my thoughts of life

and what it holds.

It is cloudy here today,

rare, though it may quickly

change to sun.

I feel promises,

and smell the possibility

of rain so welcomed

in this desert.

Interesting how one thing

can be so welcomed

here in this Southwest desert,

yet often unwelcomed

in the greenness of the north,

the place I once called home.

Here the water speaks its life-giving

phrases and we gladly

welcome it.

Dancing in puddles of summer monsoons.

Stopping, halting at raging

washes, be careful.

Rain, life giving force.

Gentle, or thunderous filling

rivers to overflowing.

One moment taking, trampling,

pummeling until the loss is

too much.

Rain so welcomed

on this dry Southwest day.

Spring rain sprouting forth

wildflowers in abandon.

Spring rain raging, flooding,

taking life as it so often gives.

This cloudy day of

memories past.

Of thoughts of possibilities.

The anticipation of new life.

One of my own creation.

Those long ago thoughts happy

with possibility.

Until that possibility became the daily life

created by another of my choice.

Falling into a life led

by terror, by sadness.

A life of empty promises.

So much pain.

So much suffering.

Stuffed daily to make life

“happy” with forced smile,

with children.

Teaching them to think of possibilities.

You hide and stuff and dream of life lost.

Of those possibilities not so long ago

that too long have been forgotten.

Remembering being too painful.

Stuck in a life chosen

by another.

You are a manikin, a shell,

living life, or not.

All energy focused on

loving children.

Your only saving grace.

Eggshell walking daily you

face the double edged sword.

Fearful of life.

Sick and unwanted,

tossed out

and…rejected.

Unloved, never appreciated

for who you really are or were.

For in this daily living,

survival was all you knew.

And self was lost the day

you were led down the aisle.

No possibilities here and you knew.

Desert Rain, cloudy skies

opening me up for new possibilities.

Life full of promise,

full of love for my Beloved.

Thoughts, no memories

of all possibilities felt

when life was still so young, so naive.

Life, older now, living

in a body of old pains, complaints,

leftovers from fear.

Feeling my unique and

wonderful self.

Treasured for who I truly am.

New Life.

New Possibilities.

Cloudy days full of promise.

Cloudy times turning to sun.

Turning to turquoise skies,

to light,

to painting and loving.

To being cherished,

soaking up all promises

of possibilities.

Living, creating a life

full to the brim.

Happiness is mine, ours.

New Life.

New Possibilities.